Realwomen.co.nz

Have a better picture of your dilemma now with addition of more complete details Grumpy. The laws are possibly a little different between our two countries, but I think that if you are paying for insurance against guest damage to property and loss of income, and if you do have guests who will not accept responsibility and pay up, when asked nicely, then you probably have no alternative other than to claim from your insurance company. It is , what you are paying the premiums for after all. However, in saying that, I agree that it can be time consuming , and inconvenient to have to go through all the motions, trying to find suitable replacements or awaiting repairs where possible but that part of it is not easily avoided. It is lmost as bad as loosing ones wallet , and the rigamarole one goes through when that happens. But I don't see any other options for you. They must have been really rough types, to destroy a chair and and a settee. Makes you wonder what the heck they were up to in there. I think those types are a minority group of people, and I believe that 99% of people who are heavier than average, are cautious and wary about where they sit, and the very last thing that they would have happen is the embarrassment of breaking other people's property. I have several friends who would also be considered to be obese, ( some folk even think that 70kg is obese) I am talking of over 100kgs here, and I believe , like myself, they look carefully at chairs in cafe's etc before sitting down and all will treat motel furniture with the respect that they should do.
I think that in this case, with the aftermath of a wrecked chair and also the damaged back of a settee, it seems that you have been unfortunate enough to have struck one of the minority of people who just do not care, who are irresponsible and who give other plump people a bad name. It is a shame that you accepted another booking from them for next year. You did not have too, and you are not obliged to make any explanations for having a full house that week. Just smile sweetly and say, you are sorry, but there is no room at the inn if you think that having them there is not worth the risks or the hassles that may result .
Not sure what you can do now though... once the booking has been accepted , it is more difficult . I would not leave it too long though before telling them that an error has been made, and you now find that you cannot accomodate them.

Hi Kk

Thanks for the reply

You are right I have to bite the bullet and contact them.

It was an awkward situation, they have been coming here for 6 years and always book a year in advance. The etiquette with this type of things is: those who come one year get first refusal for the following year, in fact they had already told me they wanted to book the other unit for next year before the chair broke.

I know it wasn't deliberate, they are nice people. I think they just don't realise, or want to realise, just how big they have got. I would estimate the two women are over 150kgs. In fact I was amazed they turned up this time because their condition is deteriorating each year, and they are now in quite a bad way. The heaviest of the women can barely walk the 10meters from the unit to my office.

Like most of us I think they see the world from their own perspective and don't really think about alternative points of view. I suspect deep down they must know their weight is the issue but denial it a powerful thing.

There is no way I can tell them I made a mistake because they know how the booking system works. So I have to work out how to cancel them.

So do I contact them and say their weight now makes my units unsuitable for them ??? I am sure no-one would welcome the prospect of saying that to anyone, especially people they like.

Looking back now I wish I had sat down and gone through the situation before they left. This is a customer service environment as such my job is to look after customers, so I am in that frame of mind. When I have had problem guests before (they have been few and far between and pretty minor) it has been easier because the people have only been here once, and are not here at a time when bookings for the next year are done before they leave.

I have looked on the net and it seems that when people are faced with broken furniture their instinct is to say it doesn’t matter, and not make a fuss, it’s an embarrassing and awkward situation, no-one wants to make people feel bad.

This is nothing personal against them or anyone else, I have to make a business decision.

Just my 2 cents worth Grumpy, ...but here it is against the law, to discriminate against heavy people, or others because of age, race, religion, etc, ...you would have the same or similar law in Oz I'm sure.

I am just pointing this out so you don't make a mistake that could be a payout of thousands, if you don't comply.

I'm sure a good lawyer would give you the correct advice,...not us so much, as we are just giving our thoughts to you, & are not qualified to give you real truths.

At first I thought your problems were Female problems, & was going to warn you that many men surf womens sites, & are public sites. ...so I waited until you explained the situation properly before answering.

Now happily, a big welcome to you.

I hope you get the right advice to deal with your problem pretty soon.

Hi 7

Many thanks for the welcome and your comments.

I always have to be cautious about the possibility of legal action, however, Australia does not have any specific laws about 'weight discrimination'. I actually have strong values around fairness and equality and anyone (and their money of course) is welcome here. As I mentioned before there are ways a small number of people have got my 'don't book list, but the basic rules are - pay the bill, be considerate to me, the neighbours, or other guests, and don't damage the joint.

This is really more of a health and safety issue, and also about protecting my property and business. In a similar way, perhaps, as smoking in banned in my units, also around my pool. Some properties have a total smoking ban but I do allow it outside the units. I recall when smoking laws first came in some smokers tried to claim discrimination but they got nowhere with that one.

No business like mine can possibly accommodate for every need, it is impractical on many levels. Even if it was possible the costs would be prohibitive. Margins are already tight, if I was required to bring in specialised furniture and fittings the place would have to close.

It is all very unfortunate but I just don't want the worry and stress. I feel I have the right to put my own needs first on this one. I e-mailed the family a few days ago asking them again specifically what they feel was the cause of the accident, explained that issues around health and safety are very important and I have to take them seriously. I asked what steps, if any, they would suggest, or expect me to take, to ensure there are no similar incidents, I have not heard back. I don' think they are too concerned about my position in this.

To some extent I brought this on myself, I was on the back foot and too embarrassed to be honest at the time.
Anyway this type of thing gets me thinking about my own health and reminds me how important it is to me to keep myself well. I have been lazy for a couple of years.

I started with a trainer again at the start of the month. I got a wake-up call when I realised how weak and unfit I have become. It’s going to take a while of course but I am working at getting my running (I use that term in a broad sense) back to 10k’s and improving my strength.

I also need to improve my diet, although I haven’t attacked that much so far my belt has already gone in one notch.

I think nearly all women would say. they have gone down a dress size Grumpy, ....not gone down a belt notch.

It really is a struggle isn't it, I lost an amount and then had to go on BP meds I have gained back 4 Kgs in 3 weeks, the appetite has gone through the roof. Will have to buckle right down again and use some tummy fillers. Good luck with it Grumpy, at least once you have built muscle it returns very quickly when you get back to it.

Dress !!! I have to admit I don't own one.

In summer I am shorts, in winter jeans or trousers ...... maybe that's why I'm single : -)

Two more belt notches to go ..... then I should be back in my smaller jeans ....